5/7/10
4/2/10
3/11/10
Panera Bread Advertisement
A couple of years ago, there was this really bizarre series of ads for Panera Bread on the radio. The format was two or more people having a conversation while a voiceover narrated their food. It's just as weird as it sounds. Por ejemplo:
"Hey George, did you see the game last night?"
"Yeah! I can't believe we won!"
George ordered a Mexican chicken wrap, full of our spicy grilled chicken and signature mole sauce.
"I thought for sure we would have lost if we didn't go into overtime."
The wrap is paired perfectly with Panera's hearty Spanish bean soup. Each spoonful contains 3 different types of beans in our wholesome chipotle broth.
Then they go on to finish their inane conversation, with a few more creepy food descriptions thrown in for good measure.
Fucking weird concept for a commercial.
"Hey George, did you see the game last night?"
"Yeah! I can't believe we won!"
George ordered a Mexican chicken wrap, full of our spicy grilled chicken and signature mole sauce.
"I thought for sure we would have lost if we didn't go into overtime."
The wrap is paired perfectly with Panera's hearty Spanish bean soup. Each spoonful contains 3 different types of beans in our wholesome chipotle broth.
Then they go on to finish their inane conversation, with a few more creepy food descriptions thrown in for good measure.
Fucking weird concept for a commercial.
3/5/10
Late Nite Write
It's after midnight, so it's time to write a little something!
It was December 6, 1941. A pleasant Hawaiian breeze blew through the open window of Col. Harrison McCafferty's office, slightly ruffling the floral print curtains his ex-wife had installed last fall. McCafferty shifted impatiently in his leather chair. Robert was supposed to be there 25 minutes ago, he'd said something about important documents regarding national security. Well if it's so damned important, McCafferty thought, why can't he be bothered to show up on time?
McCafferty was a hard man, born on the eve of the twentieth century to a family that didn't want him. He somehow survived his first 16 years in a dismal shack, just outside of Maynard County, Alabama. As soon as he could, he enlisted in the army. It was all he could do to escape his desolate existence. He worked his way though the ranks, thriving on the discipline, inhaling the codified system of the military.
It's late. That's all I've got for tonight.
It was December 6, 1941. A pleasant Hawaiian breeze blew through the open window of Col. Harrison McCafferty's office, slightly ruffling the floral print curtains his ex-wife had installed last fall. McCafferty shifted impatiently in his leather chair. Robert was supposed to be there 25 minutes ago, he'd said something about important documents regarding national security. Well if it's so damned important, McCafferty thought, why can't he be bothered to show up on time?
McCafferty was a hard man, born on the eve of the twentieth century to a family that didn't want him. He somehow survived his first 16 years in a dismal shack, just outside of Maynard County, Alabama. As soon as he could, he enlisted in the army. It was all he could do to escape his desolate existence. He worked his way though the ranks, thriving on the discipline, inhaling the codified system of the military.
It's late. That's all I've got for tonight.
3/3/10
A Ponderance
Who was the first fat person in history?
At what point had we advanced far enough as a species to facilitate excess weight gain?
Early man, as we all know, was nomadic. If we spent all of that time roaming around, we had no opportunity to get fat, right? But what about agriculture? What of early civilization? When were we so far removed from hunting/gathering and consistent exercise that a person who was comfortable in their lifestyle could eat and remain sedentary long enough to get fat?
I bet the first fat guy was a king.
A ruler, government official, mortal deity; whomever was so inclined to do nothing but order others around all day was surely the first to get fat.
What did everyone else think?
They had surely never seen a fat person before. Maybe a pudgy old person, grown saggy and stooped with age and inactivity, but not a young, healthy chap. Of course, they'd all seen pregnant women before.
They probably thought their king was pregnant.
"Hey Gamelon, have you seen Esthezius lately?"
"Yeah, I have... Looks kind of odd, don't you think?"
"That's what I was thinking! He reminds me of my wife before she birthed our third."
"You don't think he's expecting a brood do you?"
"I don't know. I've never seen a pregnant man."
I'll bet a lot of early efforts to create substantial government were hindered by the public opinion that their leader was pregnant.
At what point had we advanced far enough as a species to facilitate excess weight gain?
Early man, as we all know, was nomadic. If we spent all of that time roaming around, we had no opportunity to get fat, right? But what about agriculture? What of early civilization? When were we so far removed from hunting/gathering and consistent exercise that a person who was comfortable in their lifestyle could eat and remain sedentary long enough to get fat?
I bet the first fat guy was a king.
A ruler, government official, mortal deity; whomever was so inclined to do nothing but order others around all day was surely the first to get fat.
What did everyone else think?
They had surely never seen a fat person before. Maybe a pudgy old person, grown saggy and stooped with age and inactivity, but not a young, healthy chap. Of course, they'd all seen pregnant women before.
They probably thought their king was pregnant.
"Hey Gamelon, have you seen Esthezius lately?"
"Yeah, I have... Looks kind of odd, don't you think?"
"That's what I was thinking! He reminds me of my wife before she birthed our third."
"You don't think he's expecting a brood do you?"
"I don't know. I've never seen a pregnant man."
I'll bet a lot of early efforts to create substantial government were hindered by the public opinion that their leader was pregnant.
Day Zero
So, this is my blog.
No one is going to read this.
I am going to post about things I like. These things include music, art, movies, books, video games, etc.
No one is going to read this.
No one is going to read this.
I am going to post about things I like. These things include music, art, movies, books, video games, etc.
No one is going to read this.
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